I haven't been around in awhile, you know how it is.
Mother's Day was cute.
I had a great concert experience, seeing Gang of Youths, my favorite band of the last decade.
I knew it was during a surge and I wore my KN95! Still... got COVID.
I did OK with it, and thankfully didn't pass it on to anyone as far as I know, but my kid did test positive for the flu that's been going around and was sicker than I've ever seen him. He's fine now, but it was a rough few days.
I was at a stoplight behind this person I thought, man what an asshole. I needed to take a picture so I could parse it later, the many ways that harm was intended and the loudness of it, the inherent contradictions and willful pride.
That day was May 24th. HR was still home recovering when the reports started coming in from Texas, and I was grateful to have him in my eyesight and I didn't know how to tell him. His school was supposed to have a lockdown drill 2 days later and they had already canceled it out of respect for the trauma in Buffalo. I hope they're canceled forever for all the good they do. We can't keep doing this to our kids.
I'm still writing for myself and trying to make sense of things. Too many things, too much pain. I push it away, I immerse myself in it. I'm still looking at that picture and it still boggles my mind. We are sick, and yet we have to try to live. To take joy from where we can get it. To fight for what's right. Fight for our little dumb lives because they mean something, or, if they don't mean anything, what's the point in not burning it all down? Anyway, that's where I've been.